Gail & Karl's story

Karl was a hardworking 35-year-old family man, a loving dad to not only our son, but my daughter Rebecca. Everything fell into place for us, and we were truly happy.  We went for regular weekends away to visit Karl’s family, and they would come and visit us.  

Karl went to the doctors after losing weight drastically and was sent for tests. A few weeks later Karl received a letter stating he had stage 4 pancreatic cancer and his only treatment available was palliative care. It was like my whole world fell apart. We had only been married five years.

I knew about Dove House as my brother-in-law was cared for there. so, when Karl received his diagnosis my first thought was the hospice.

As soon as we walked into Dove House for respite care and spoke to the staff all of our worries disappeared. The Inpatient Unit was calm, peaceful and friendly. It was fully equipped with everything we needed. We felt like it was a home from home. The nurses, doctors and volunteers became like our family; they made my husband and everyone who visited him feel at ease. Nothing was ever too much, they handed out tissues when needed and laughed with us when we didn't feel like laughing was an option. They knew how to read the room and how to react to each situation when they entered the room.  Dove House helped Karl by giving him peace, respect, love and care.

We were also able to stay in their wonderful holiday caravan, The Dovecote, so we could make lasting memories one final time. Although Karl was ill, he was able to still be a part of the holiday and watch our son swim and we could even bring Karl’s mum and dad to be a part of the special break. The caravan was beautifully decorated and had simple home comforts to help Karl feel like he was able to escape from all the hospital and cancer talks. The caravan allowed us to be a family and be happy again. Even though we knew the reason we were there we were able to forget and just be in the moment every single day.

Karl returned to the hospice and again nothing was ever too much. We had a lot of visitors coming to spend time with Karl and we were able to use the hospice’s family suite which allowed us to have a break away from the bedside but still be close by. Dove House was our safe place to express whichever emotion we may be feeling without feeling guilty or ashamed, there are spaces we could just go and sit and take a moment without any noise to take everything in.
Karl had reiki which helped him relax and take away the stress he was feeling. We could also enjoy the gardens which have a beautiful array of flowers, they added colour to what seemed like a time with no colour. It was really peaceful to be out there.  

When Karl died, he was surrounded by family holding his hand. Dove House made the end of my husband's life memorable for the right reasons. They allowed us to have peaceful memories and not fear what was coming. 

The best thing was how the care and empathy comes so naturally, the care is tailored to the individual. The hospice made us feel included and like we had a voice. They made us feel as though a weight has been lifted.

Dove House supported us throughout our bereavement. I was offered counselling, and our son accessed the Children’s Bereavement Service. I will forever be grateful for waht they did for our family. We are always passionate about helping the hopsice, which is why I am sharing our story. Dove House will forever hold a special place in all our hearts.